Working Mother

Last weekend, we had gone out for dinner with some of my husband's office colleagues and there family. In all we were 4 families and as usual we were chatting about kids, maids, work etc. But after sometime I realized that all the other women except me were house wives. 2 of them had left their job after kids and 1 never took up any job. They talked about how relieved they were after leaving their job and how much more time and attention they can give to their kids now. Suddenly I had few questions that came to my mind? Like am I doing something wrong by being a working mother? Is it really that my kids are missing out on something specially my time and amount of interaction I have with them? Am I really sacrificing anything on my home front by opting to be a working mother? I asked my husband casually how he would feel if I leave my job. Will I be a better wife and home maker and above all a better mother? He is very clever, he never gives me direct replies to such questions and smiled and said you have right to choose the way you want to live your life and you only are the best judge. I do not have any problem, whatever you choose. Oh I knew the answer but still gave a try.
So I introspected, I observed my kids, relived my routine life in my mind as to what compromises I am making, if any, by choosing to work. For me my mother was not working so I even tried talking to some of my friends whose mother was working to find out. Almost everyone said they never felt any difference. In fact they were all proud of the way they were brought up, specially the girls. I think girls realize what their mother have done for them after they are mothers themselves and same for guys too. Once you step into the role played by someone else you realize where exactly it bites the most :) So in all I spoke to some 10 women some working, some not working. And from the working one's I got the reply that they believe in spending quality time with kids. They never feel they are compromising anything instead they have learned to take help for the everyday household stuff and also learnt to let go at times. Also there kids are more independent. For the ones who are not working they said, they can plan activities related to kids more and they are able to socialize which was not possible before. They are always available for all the big to small needs of their child.
So really question that I had in beginning does not have any definite answer. I just believe that if you are happy everything else falls in place. You are able to spread that happiness to your family, your society and vice versa. So the key to all this is that women should see what is she happy doing. If she is happy when she steps out of house and do something she is skilled to do, she gets that extra energy & enthusiasm to handle the things at home. And if some women feel that they would be more happy to sit at home and take care of everything on their own. That is how they always wished to live their life. They should definitely take a break and enjoy. That is the only way you can take care of your family because I strongly believe that the charm, enthusiasm, togetherness and enjoyment in any family is brought by the women of that family. And kids are mirror image of their parents. So kids who are more happy, bubbly & cheerful are more likely to have similar parents. So it’s just that we should not be comparing ourselves with others in taking such decisions, it all depends on individual. There is nothing as right or wrong here. It’s the sense of responsibility that comes to everyone as soon as they enter the parenthood and how each one wants to handle that is left to that individual.

Mother - Topmost influencer in anyone's life

I am back after a long gap of more than a year now. For me the last year was very happening. My life took a completely different direction. 2 sweet little babies came in my life. Its a wonderful experience to be a mother. Out of all the roles I play in my life being a manager/daughter/sister/wife etc., mother is the one which is very special and satisfying.

3 months after birth, your baby's first smile can bring out your tears. Playing with your kids, just like them can make you forget the world. Holding your baby next to you and sleeping or just keeping silent for a while can give you that happiness and satisfaction which nothing else in this world would be able to fulfill.

I also realize that bringing up kids is all together a different challenge and mother plays a very important role in anybody's life. When I think of anyone (husband/neighbour/colleagues), I try to imagine how they must have been brought up in life. How would be there parents? how they must be in childhood days? Any person I see whether its sachin tendulkar or osama-bin-laden, whatever they are, the base for that has been there childhood days and how they were brought up. Looking at that I commit to myself everyday to be a perfect role model for my kids. All parents want to give the best to there kids. I am also one of them.

After meeting Sameer Sir (ISP Teacher), I have come to know many more things about parenting. And not just parenting but being yourself and living every moment happily. I am very thankful to him for showing me the way to live life completely. Whenever any negative thought comes to my mind, I just think about his words and I am back to normal. He has rekindled those hidden feelings inside me and now I can say I am more aware of myself. I have also learned to let go to much extent and am contended to large extent. My kids have become the source of energy for me and as much time I spend with them I get more and more energy.

I thank you almighty for giving me such a wonderful life with 2 lovely little beings around. I cannot ask for anything more and I make a promise today to be ideal role model for my kids. I will let them explore the things on there own, make them independent but will always be around if they need me for guidance. Provide a very loving and happy environment at home but will encourage them to go out and face the world. Will talk to them daily about sad/happy/vow moments in my life and understand and be with them completely when they are talking to me. Will be best companion for them in there plays but will encourage them to go out for social gatherings and make friends. I will always be around them but will never come in there way. I will be there to guide them if they have any queries but will always encourage them to take there own decisions. My kids are my first priority but I have other important roles as well in my life, although mother is the most interesting of all.